kitteh citteh

stone killa tails from the gritteh citteh, ya feel meh? (AKA cats + "The Wire")

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“Hold up- I don’t know if I wanna put all this shit on the record. Don’t write that stuff about Catsterdam. That was a dark time, you know? I can’t un-see the shit I’ve seen, or undo the damage I done… and I don’t know if I want The Sun telling the world about it. How many people you think will even read this? Shit, I need a cigarette.” -Nuttles

“Hold up- I don’t know if I wanna put all this shit on the record. Don’t write that stuff about Catsterdam. That was a dark time, you know? I can’t un-see the shit I’ve seen, or undo the damage I done… and I don’t know if I want The Sun telling the world about it. How many people you think will even read this? Shit, I need a cigarette.” -Nuttles

The life of a Criminal Informant in the citteh wasn’t an easy one. It could be hard on a hustler- the double life, the secrets, and all the guilt. Some cats didn’t have a choice- because the po-po put their balls to the wall and made them decide between being a CI and going to Jessup. Sure, some soldiers might say you always have a choice- that you shut your mouth, take one for the family, and do your fuckin time. But most of them aint never been cavity searched. Or fisted.

The life of a Criminal Informant in the citteh wasn’t an easy one. It could be hard on a hustler- the double life, the secrets, and all the guilt. Some cats didn’t have a choice- because the po-po put their balls to the wall and made them decide between being a CI and going to Jessup. Sure, some soldiers might say you always have a choice- that you shut your mouth, take one for the family, and do your fuckin time. But most of them aint never been cavity searched. Or fisted.

Another sloppy exit from Kavenaugh’s, courtesy of Detective McNutkins. Maybe he’d manage to drive to a diner, eat some grub to soak up all the whiskey. Maybe he’d find a waitress desperate enough to excite his booze-soaked johnson. Maybe he’d just drive into shit all night long, while blasting The Pogues. What else was fucking new?

Another sloppy exit from Kavenaugh’s, courtesy of Detective McNutkins.

Maybe he’d manage to drive to a diner, eat some grub to soak up all the whiskey. Maybe he’d find a waitress desperate enough to excite his booze-soaked johnson. Maybe he’d just drive into shit all night long, while blasting The Pogues. What else was fucking new?

When you walk through the garden, you sometimes end up tripping balls in a place called Catsterdam. Spanky thought he finally found paradise! A legalized drug zone..?? Yes!  And no more po-po on his tail about getting high on the street?! RIGHT ON! Too bad this fiending pusseh OD’d on his 3rd night there.  Now he’s way down in a hole.

When you walk through the garden, you sometimes end up tripping balls in a place called Catsterdam.

Spanky thought he finally found paradise! A legalized drug zone..?? Yes!  And no more po-po on his tail about getting high on the street?! RIGHT ON!

Too bad this fiending pusseh OD’d on his 3rd night there.  Now he’s way down in a hole.

Spanky looked down from the towers he grew up in and reflected on how far he’d come in his life. From a baby hopper to a corner boy, from hustler to the top soldier of his crew. He was King of this small kingdom now. But he wasn’t above owning any bodies. He never forgot about all the people who stepped tewww him over the years. Even if someone was fucking dumb enough to offer advice on how he should run his crew, you know, he’d try and be all humble and shit at first, maybe think on it for a quick minute, and then he’d shoot that cunt in the face. Bitch please, who you talking to??

Spanky looked down from the towers he grew up in and reflected on how far he’d come in his life. From a baby hopper to a corner boy, from hustler to the top soldier of his crew. He was King of this small kingdom now. But he wasn’t above owning any bodies. He never forgot about all the people who stepped tewww him over the years. Even if someone was fucking dumb enough to offer advice on how he should run his crew, you know, he’d try and be all humble and shit at first, maybe think on it for a quick minute, and then he’d shoot that cunt in the face. Bitch please, who you talking to??

“That young, ignorant motherfucker just used his burner to call me about a re-up. Can you believe that shit? These less enlightened ones, they never learn. But check it- he’s pickin up our package on Albemarle Street. You know what that means, right? Sheeeeeiiiiiiitttt, cannolis from Vaccaro’s! On that motherfucker’s dime tewww, heh heh heh.” - Proposition Spanky

“That young, ignorant motherfucker just used his burner to call me about a re-up. Can you believe that shit? These less enlightened ones, they never learn. But check it- he’s pickin up our package on Albemarle Street. You know what that means, right? Sheeeeeiiiiiiitttt, cannolis from Vaccaro’s! On that motherfucker’s dime tewww, heh heh heh.” - Proposition Spanky

Nutkins knew there was something about this bitch he couldn’t fully trust, and now it all made sense. She was working with the po-po, wearing a motherfucking wire this whole time. He told his top soldier Spanky to take her down and to also send word: “I’m’ a bring some fuckin mayhem on anyone who helped this pussy.”

Nutkins knew there was something about this bitch he couldn’t fully trust, and now it all made sense. She was working with the po-po, wearing a motherfucking wire this whole time. He told his top soldier Spanky to take her down and to also send word: “I’m’ a bring some fuckin mayhem on anyone who helped this pussy.”

“For chrissakes, you guys, seriously? Can you please stop fucking with my fucking computer, you fucking Neanderthals? Too bad the Mayor’s not swinging by the precinct for another surprise visit- I’m sure he’d love to see his constituents’ tax-paying dollars at work here, ya fucking clowns. ” - Detective McNutkins

“For chrissakes, you guys, seriously? Can you please stop fucking with my fucking computer, you fucking Neanderthals? Too bad the Mayor’s not swinging by the precinct for another surprise visit- I’m sure he’d love to see his constituents’ tax-paying dollars at work here, ya fucking clowns. ” - Detective McNutkins

Kitteh bodies are turning up all over the citteh this week, a few at a time even, like a goddamn massacre. Word on the street is that the Spanky organization is behind them all. He’s making sure anybody that might know his business won’t get a chance to strike a deal with the po-po or even consider testifying against him. It’s called cleaning house, and ain’t nobody safe.

Kitteh bodies are turning up all over the citteh this week, a few at a time even, like a goddamn massacre. Word on the street is that the Spanky organization is behind them all. He’s making sure anybody that might know his business won’t get a chance to strike a deal with the po-po or even consider testifying against him. It’s called cleaning house, and ain’t nobody safe.

“Sshhhh baby boo, stay in bed. Nobody knows we here. I’m just checkin out them hustlers from the Nutkins crew. They’re having some kind of parlez down there with some fat motherfucker I don’t recognize. Maybe he’s the new connect. Or maybe he’s just a new, fat-ass hopper. I mean, shit, all these new faces in the game, how am I supposed to know which dealers to robs? I have to stay on top of this shit, boo. ” -Spanky

“Sshhhh baby boo, stay in bed. Nobody knows we here. I’m just checkin out them hustlers from the Nutkins crew. They’re having some kind of parlez down there with some fat motherfucker I don’t recognize. Maybe he’s the new connect. Or maybe he’s just a new, fat-ass hopper. I mean, shit, all these new faces in the game, how am I supposed to know which dealers to robs? I have to stay on top of this shit, boo. ” -Spanky

Detective McNutkins couldn’t sleep. He could feel Spanky’s eyes burning a hole in the back of his head. Maybe if he pretended to sleep, Spanky would stop asking him why he was out so late, or why his breath smelled of Jameson again. The fuck did Spanky want from him anyway? He was dedicated PO-lice, a citteh cop… not a goddamned house cat.

Detective McNutkins couldn’t sleep. He could feel Spanky’s eyes burning a hole in the back of his head. Maybe if he pretended to sleep, Spanky would stop asking him why he was out so late, or why his breath smelled of Jameson again. The fuck did Spanky want from him anyway? He was dedicated PO-lice, a citteh cop… not a goddamned house cat.

“This stash house is totally fucking empty… somebody must’ve tipped ‘em off. Maybe we can trace bits of coke there in that corner, but it’s a goddamned wash. These motherfuckers knew we were coming, Spank. I’ve been on this place for weeks, and now I gotta worry about a goddamn leak in our own department? The fuck am I supposed to do now, start from fucking scratch again? This is bullshit!” - Detective McNutkins

“This stash house is totally fucking empty… somebody must’ve tipped ‘em off. Maybe we can trace bits of coke there in that corner, but it’s a goddamned wash. These motherfuckers knew we were coming, Spank. I’ve been on this place for weeks, and now I gotta worry about a goddamn leak in our own department? The fuck am I supposed to do now, start from fucking scratch again? This is bullshit!” - Detective McNutkins

Mayor Spanketti loved his wife. He genuinely did. But he also loved the risks, the dangers, and the thrill of swinging his dick at any pussy that welcomed it. If the papers or his opponent got wind of all this, his campaign and his family would go down in flames. He was living on the edge and he knew it, but for the first time is ages he felt…alive.

Mayor Spanketti loved his wife. He genuinely did. But he also loved the risks, the dangers, and the thrill of swinging his dick at any pussy that welcomed it. If the papers or his opponent got wind of all this, his campaign and his family would go down in flames. He was living on the edge and he knew it, but for the first time is ages he felt…alive.

“Don’t get it twisted, son. I’m just trying to school you, get you away from the hustlin’ nonsense. At the end of the day, you gotta own your decisions- so you need to decide if you wanna take your beef to the street, or if you wanna work it on out in my boxing ring… preferably the motherfuckin latter.” - Nutty

“Don’t get it twisted, son. I’m just trying to school you, get you away from the hustlin’ nonsense. At the end of the day, you gotta own your decisions- so you need to decide if you wanna take your beef to the street, or if you wanna work it on out in my boxing ring… preferably the motherfuckin latter.” - Nutty